A Dad confided in me recently.
“Ben, I’m ready to step back. I just wish the kids would start taking on some real responsibility.”
The interesting bit?
The next generation were telling me almost exactly the opposite.
“We’re ready. We are ready for more responsibility.”
So Dad’s ready. The kids are ready.
Twelve months passes and bugger all changes.
I see this more often than you’d think.
The kids are already making plenty of the smaller calls.
They run jobs. Manage staff. Make purchases. Sort out the day-to-day without needing Dad standing over their shoulder.
But then the stakes get bigger.
The season turns against you and you have to decide whether to sell stock early, feed through, or back yourself for rain.
The neighbours block is coming up for sale
A key staff member wants more money
And everyone looks at Mum & Dad.
For a while, that’s exactly what should happen.
They’re learning. Mum & Dad have thirty or forty years of judgement they haven’t got yet. Part of preparing the next generation is letting them see how he thinks when the consequences are real.
But at some point, that has to shift.
Because every time the stakes get high and they look to Mum & Dad for the answer, Mum & Dad gives it to them.
Then six months later Dad’s wondering why they still won’t make the big calls themselves.
That’s the trap.
They look to Mum and Dad because Mum and Dad have always known.
Dad answers because the kids are looking at him.
Round and round it goes.
The shift doesn’t mean Mum and Dad throws them the keys and disappears.
It means changing what happens when everyone looks at them.
Instead of giving them the answer:
“What do you reckon we should do?”
Let them think.
Let them make the recommendation.
And eventually, let them make the call.
They won’t get every one right.
Neither did Mum & Dad.
But if the next generation only ever gets to make the decisions where there’s bugger all at stake, how are they supposed to learn to make the ones that really matter?
So next time a big decision lands on the table and everyone turns to Mum or Dad, pay attention to what happens next.
Are you still giving them the answer… or are you teaching them how to find their own?
We're now taking waitlist applications for our 2027 Roadmap Workshop. If you want to be in the paddock next year instead of watching from the gate, join the waitlist at www.agricoach.com.au/takeaction. You'll be the first to know when the next workshop is announced.
Talk soon, Ben
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Disclaimer: The information contained in this article is general in nature and for education purposes only. It is not financial advice. No one should act on the information without appropriate specific advice for your particular circumstances. Ben Law is a former financial advisor but is no longer licensed and cannot and will not give you specific or personal advice in this article. The Financial Bloke Group Pty Ltd accepts no responsibility for any loss or damage occasioned by any person acting or refraining from action as a result of reliance on the information in this article.